For three years, I lived on 60-75% of my income. I can count on two hands how many times I went shopping. I was a hermit, and my friends had to convince me to take breaks. I was in the zone. For three years, I focused solely on one thing. I dropped everything for this. Every day was the same thing: 6:30 wake up, go to work, leave work between 2:00 & 3:00, go to class, get home sometime between 8:00 & 9:30 (a couple times I was lucky enough to get home at 6:30!), eat, do urgent assignments, and sleep as soon as I could. On the weekends, I slept in and did school work. When my brain couldn’t take anymore, I’d try to relax and do something else–mostly procrastination–but there was always something else I should have been doing. That guilt was always eating at me, so even the times of relaxation were stressful…for three years.
Those three years were not only the most stressful time of my life but also the most focused and peaceful time of my life. There is a nice calm that comes over you when you know for certain what you are doing, why you are doing it, and what the outcome will be. When you know what you’re doing, the decision-making process is simple–at least it should be. There is only one question that needs answering: Is this going to get me closer to what I want? If the answer is yes, you do it. If no, you don’t. Plain and simple. In the stressful times, it was very comforting knowing that the chaos was for a reason–a good reason. It kept me going.
I saw firsthand how God loves unconditionally. I neglected my spiritual life often all in the name of being too busy, too tired, too this, too that. But God never stopped providing for me and ordering my steps. It was three years of confusing amazement. On one hand, I felt far from Him, but on the other hand, I’d never felt closer.
In three years, I met a lot of interesting people and learned a lot of interesting stuff. I hope that I was able to make a positive impression.
The last three years were awesome experiences, but I am relieved they are over. This post is bittersweet (mostly sweet though) because it is the finale of The 2nd Time Around category. People have been asking me “what next?” You’ll see! I expect the next three years to be far more awesome than the previous.